Insaan Uski Baat Samjhta Hai, Jise Wo Kuchh Samjhta Hai – Vikas Jain

Insaan uski baat samjhta hai, jise wo kuchh samjhta hai – Vikas Jain

English version: People value the advice of someone whom they really value as SOMEONE.

Background:

Long back when I just started, a friend of mine who was struggling with his career came to me to seek help.  As we sat together and started talking and I suggested him ways to improve business and motivated him to cope up with the ups and downs that one might face in life. I noticed that he was not paying much attention to me and to what I was trying to say but as he was one of my very close friends I wanted to help him and motivate him so that he does not feel discouraged about his business.

Frustrated he got up and said, “Vikas, you are advising me, what about your own business. Why don’t you try and incorporate your advice into your own business!”

As I was close to him and that was the last statement that I had expected out of him, I was shocked. And then I commented “Insaan uski baat samjhta hai, jise wo kuchh samjhta hai” (English version: People value the advice of someone whom they really value as SOMEONE)

So before you share your advice, first try and study the gesture of the person if he is seeking genuine advice or just sympathy from you.

Now if somebody comes up to me and seeks advice, I try and understand his gesture and react accordingly.

How to get cues that person is not interested in your advice?

1. The person may look distracted
2. The person may not be responding to your suggestions
3. The person may distract you from the main topic

Earlier!!

I used to keep going back to the initial conversation of providing the solution to the person.

Now!!

I try and understand the gesture of the person, I try to analyze what exactly does he seek. If he doesn’t seem to be interested or is distracted, I step back and leave the conversation open-ended. And if he seems to be interested I try and give him the best possible advice.